What Would Your Biblical Name Be?

By: Zoe Samuel
Estimated Completion Time
5 min
What Would Your Biblical Name Be?
Image: Shutterstock

About This Quiz

In the 21st century, there are children with biblical names, but there are also many, many children named for things in dead languages, favorite cities, and even kitchen appliances.  The meaning of a name has been diluted because anyone can be named after anything.  Often the name of a person says more about their parents than it does about them. In biblical times, names were holy: a biblical name usually translates into a phrase in Hebrew and Aramaic. These phrases could mean something as straightforward as Michael (Who is like God) or as obscure as Zohar (which is a book of mysticism and also translates to "Brilliant").

A name is just a sound used to identify one specific person, but a biblical name is about an outlook on God, the purpose of mankind, and one's individual destiny. Some names are preordained for specific biblical figures yet to be revealed, and others are repeatedly used, signaling the continuity of humanity in God's creation.

So take stock of your life and prepare yourself for an onslaught of questions. You may possess a biblical name already, but it may not be your "true" biblical name. We will determine what your biblical name should be so that you can see your way to your destiny.

How religious are you?
Not very.
Not at all.
Very.
A bit.

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Did you grow up in a religious home?
No.
Yes.
It was very religious, but not very observant.
It was very secular but observant.

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How self-reliant are you?
Totally.
Mostly.
I need my family.
I need my community.

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How do you imagine God?
I don't believe in God.
I think of God as the "Prime Mover."
I imagine an old man in the sky.
I'm a deist.

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Which edition of the bible is your favorite?
I like all three versions: the Torah, the Bible, and The Quran.
I like the first edition.
I think the King James Bible is the best.
The one I find in hotel rooms.

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What biblical places have you visited?
I've been to the Sea of Galilee.
I've been to Masada.
I've been to the Dome of the Rock.
I haven't been to any biblical places.

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How familiar are you with the Apocrypha?
I've never heard of the Apocrypha.
I'm very familiar with the Apocrypha.
I know a little about it.
I know one or two stories.

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Are you interested in other sects of your religion?
I'm not really interested in any other sects.
In as much as they are in my geographical area.
In as much as some of them are in my family.
Of course! They are part of my community.

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How much do you wrestle with moral questions at work?
Frequently.
Every day.
Rarely.
Never.

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Do you tithe?
No! That's not for me.
I used to.
I do still.
I used to but do not anymore.

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How often do you pray?
Never.
When I'm in trouble.
Twice a day.
Once a week.

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What sort of charity do you do?
I work in a soup kitchen.
I donate to charity.
I volunteer at a shelter.
I do international charity work.

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How modest is your appearance?
I wear really cheap clothes.
I prefer "discreet."
I like to look good.
I don't focus on modesty.

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Do you make a show of how religious you are?
Not at all.
Quite the opposite.
Yes, I wear lots of religious symbols.
No more than the average person.

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Why do you think people should be good and moral?
Because good and evil would exist with or without God, and as absolutes, we are morally required to follow them.
Because of the social contract.
Because God said so.
I don't really know.

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How important is it that your friends share your level of religiosity?
Not at all.
I'd rather not hear about their religious views.
It's very important.
It'd be nice, but not a requirement.

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How well do you know your bible stories?
I don't know bible stores well at all.
I know most of them pretty well, as well as the Midrash.
I know them like the back of my hand.
I know the broad strokes.

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Do you feel as though you have a personal relationship with God?
No.
In the same way that I have a relationship with my barista.
I do!
I feel like God has better things to do.

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How ecumenical are you?
I'd have to be religious to be ecumenical, so not at all.
I respect other religions but recognize that they are not the same.
I'm not ecumenical at all.
I'm very ecumenical.

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Do you think, on balance, scripture is good or bad?
I don't know what the world would be like without it, so I can't pass judgment.
I think some of it has been good and some are definitely bad.
It's all good.
I feel like it's mostly bad.

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Are you prepared to lay it all on the line for your faith?
Not for my faith but for humanity.
If it comes to that, but I'd rather use my brain to get through problems.
Yes, totally.
No, not for my faith.

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Do you have another philosophy that guides you, besides that of your faith?
I'm a humanist.
I'm an Aristotelian.
No.
Just my instincts.

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In your estimation, which profession should the religious aspire to enter?
Doctors.
Negotiators.
Politicians.
Police.

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What is closest to your job?
Social worker.
Government employee.
I'm retired.
Public Relations.

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How would your friends describe you to others?
I think they'd say that I'm laid back.
I think they'd say that I'm sharp.
I think they'd say that I'm religious.
I think they'd say that I'm generous.

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What is your biggest life hope?
To have no regrets.
To keep my family safe.
To go to heaven when I die.
To help other people.

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Is it important to you that your children follow in your spiritual footsteps?
No.
It would make me happy, but it isn't a requirement.
Yes, and I will throw a fit if they do not.
No, but I don't want them to get lost in the "fun" parts of religion, only to neglect life's lessons from it.

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How friendly are you to strangers?
I approach them all with an expectation that they are like me.
I'm a little suspicious, because of past experiences.
I'm suspicious unless they are exactly my brand of religion.
I approach all people as my brothers and sisters.

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How loyal are you to friends?
I'm loyal unless they do something immoral, and then for their own good, I see to justice
I'm pretty loyal, as long as the loyalty is reciprocated.
I'm always loyal, no matter what.
I'm as loyal as the next person.

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How often do you sin?
Every day. Twice on Sunday.
I've lost track.
Never!
The average amount I suppose.

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You Got: