Make a Taco Bell Order and We'll Accurately Guess Which State You Live In!

Zoe Samuel

Image: Yum! Brand

About This Quiz

Your choices say everything about you. Every purchase you make, every night out with your friends, every post you make on social media triangulates who you are.

Do you like Taco Bell? Taco Bell, a subsidiary of Yum Brands, isn't just a collection of little franchises dotting the American landscape. It's a mighty corporation with multi-million dollar research and development departments and dozens of teams of marketers. These scientists know everything from the cost to calorie ratio of every item on the menu to the likes and dislikes of their customers, harvested from surveys, focus groups, and social media. 

The Taco Bell menu may seem like a gimmicky, seemingly random assortment of high calorie foods chosen to satisfy late night revelers after a night out drinking, but it is actually a fine-tuned tool of capitalism, designed to make maximum profits for Taco Bell, made to appeal to people from any state in the US of A.

This survey was stolen from the R&D department of Taco Bell by an industrial spy working for a competitor. If you take this quiz, using the publicly available data and your answers, we will narrow down what state you live in, with nearly perfect accuracy. Care to give it a try?

Which Cinnabon item will you secretly put in your purse to get you through a long bus ride?

What is the perfect taco when you've just run a marathon?

What burrito best celebrates recovering from food poisoning from your last burrito?

What side would you order if you wanted your judgmental aunt to think you were sticking to your diet?

What breakfast item would you pick to avoid offending your vegan friend any more than is necessary?

Which quesadilla best says "I promise not to do it again"?

Which Cinnabon item are you convinced is free of radiation?

What Freeze is the right way to stave off heat stroke at a baseball game?

Which power menu item would you have to celebrate the eclipse?

Which nacho bowl would you eat the contents of, but leave the nachos?

Which party pack would you not expense on the company card for fear of being judged by Meredith in accounting?

Which combo would you tell your rude uncle you're serving at dinner to trick him into not showing up?

Which quesadilla would you ask to be served without cheese?

What drink would you use for inspiration while naming your ska band?

Which caffeinated beverage would you pick for an all-nighter?

Which vegetarian item would you buy so you could point and laugh at your veggie friend while eating beef?

Which meal combo would you have after pretending to enjoy a meal with your weird in-laws?

What breakfast item would make the best projectile in a student demonstration?

Which breakfast item would you rather go hungry than have to force down your gullet?

Which breakfast item would you have to fool your body into thinking it was morning?

Which quesadilla would you give to a recently dumped friend to cheer them up?

Which beverage would you have to kill a stomach parasite?

Which taco would you use to hide your money when walking through a rough neighborhood?

Which burrito would remind you most of home?

Which side could be a meal?

If you ordered take-out with your friend, and they accidentally ate your order, over which taco would you end the friendship?

Which combo would you share with someone you wanted to passive-aggressively intimidate?

Which nachos would you eat at your desk to make your cubicle-mate jealous?

Which deal would you buy to provide three meals to get you through to payday?

Which burrito would you only eat half of and then feel slightly guilty?

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